Valentine’s Day has traditionally been a time for celebrating partnership and romance, but it can also be about celebrating the relationship you have with yourself.
By choosing to put energy toward loving yourself, you can improve your self-esteem, learn to set healthy boundaries, and live an authentic life that aligns with your values and priorities.
If you are in a good relationship or enjoy spending the holiday with your children or girlfriends, that’s great! But if this holiday is hard for you, here are some ideas for ways to show love to yourself.
Allow Yourself to Feel Your Feelings
Any holiday can evoke strong feelings and Valentine’s Day is no exception.
One important way to show love to yourself is allowing yourself to feel whatever emotions are coming up for you around this time of year – whether it be loneliness from a recent breakup, stress about being single, or grief over missing someone you loved.
Having trouble figuring out what you’re feeling? Take some time to slow down and try one of these strategies to get started:
Journal. Put your thoughts down on paper (or even in the Notes app on your phone) to promote mental clarity and emotional processing. Consider these prompts: When you think about this time of year, what comes up for you? Are there emotions you’re trying to avoid?
Listen to your body. Take a few minutes to sit still with yourself. Close your eyes and scan your body. Notice areas where you might be holding tension, such as your stomach, chest, or hands. Pause anywhere you feel a sensation and give yourself permission to stay as long as you can with it. If possible, name the sensation and breath into it.
Once you recognize what you’re feeling, practice self-compassion by allowing yourself to feel your feelings without judgment. This can take the form of compassionate self-talk, ie. “It makes sense that I feel this way. I am allowed to feel these emotions.”
Love Yourself Through Self-Care
Now that you’ve allowed yourself to feel what you need to feel, continue to show love to yourself by engaging in self-care. You might need to process those big emotions, take care of your basic needs, or do something to elevate your mood. Check-in with yourself and ask: what does my body require right now? Here are some suggestions:
Process your emotions
Via journaling
Let yourself cry it out
Write (without sending) a letter to anyone connected to the way you’re feeling
Get creative by drawing or painting a representation of your emotions
Take care of your basic needs
Take a relaxing bath or shower
Take a nap or complete a yoga nidra for relaxation
Connect with a trusted friend or family member
Elevate your mood
Go for a walk and spend some time outdoors
Engage in a simple act of kindness for a loved one, like leaving a love note on the mirror or sending them a self-love box
Take time off social media and allow yourself to just be
Write a love letter to yourself
Talk to Someone
Sometimes, the emotions we have feel unbearable. It can be a challenge not only to identify what we’re feeling but also to allow ourselves to experience the full range of human emotions and process those emotions in healthy ways.
If you’re feeling anxious, depressed, or overwhelmed and want to learn how to cope with your emotions in ways that will improve your relationship with yourself and others, our therapists can help.
Show yourself love by reaching out and talking to someone. Call or text us at (720) 255-1667, email info@hertimetherapy.com, or visit our website at www.hertimetherapy.com.
About the Author
Lauren Veazey, MA, is a graduate student in Clinical Mental Health Counseling and the Intake Coordinator for Her Time Therapy, LLC, a group therapy practice specializing in teletherapy for women. As a therapist in training under the supervision of Her Time Therapy founder Meagan Clark, she believes in the healing power of therapy for women to love themselves, trust themselves, and know themselves.
*Disclaimer: This blog does not provide medical advice and the information contained herein is for informational purposes only. This blog is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of a licensed health provider before undertaking a new treatment or health care regimen.
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